I’m using the virtual-world of Minecraft as a metaphor for the real-world again.
If I feel as though my personal difficulty-level is set to survival-mode with enemies on, is that valid? Or am I just paranoid and overly sensitive? Let’s investigate.
I’ve never really been in a tough physical situation. I’ve certainly imagined horrible scenarios, but nothing of that sort has ever manifested. I’ve never had aggressive enemies around every corner ready to jump me (despite what I imagined). I’ve never been starving, no drowning, no lava accidents, no hospital stays. I was never pressured to do something I didn’t want to do. Um. Hm. Okay I think my life is on an easier mode than I thought. So it does appear that I’m unreasonably anxious.
Okay, but it doesn’t feel like I’m in creative-mode though, maybe it’s survival-mode with the peaceful setting. I say this because my resources are very nil at the moment. Hm but I’m a bit paranoid remember, I might just be imagining lack, let’s investigate.
I have a nice little family. I live in my own home in a quiet neighborhood. I’m not in debt. Although I’m under tight financial constraints, I basically do what I want all day. My wife is an exceptional cook and I eat very well. Oh, hm, maybe I am in creative-mode.
So my problem isn’t that my settings are too hard. Hm, let’s analyze this. I am surviving without much effort at all. Life provides me the basics without having to do anything significant to acquire them. There’s clearly a safety-net keeping me alive and well. Wait, so what’s my problem then?
Oh, it’s that I default to feeling afraid and limited. If something enters my perception, I’m suspicious and tend towards negativity. I’m focused on what could go wrong, ignoring what could go right. And I’m too preoccupied with hiding from imagary foes. Ultimately, I regularly fail to apply creativity in a positive way.
But as I can plainly see by the evidence presented above, life is not out to get me. In fact, life is propping me up despite my lack of effort and appreciation. So my fear is completely unwarranted based on the evidence. And it’s also clear that I don’t lack the essentials of life.
Yet if I’m in creative-mode, shouldn’t I feel more invincible and have more direct influence over my surroundings? If I’m supposed to have the ability to alter my environment, I’m not understanding the mechanism. To perform well in any video game is to sync with its rhythm — I’m obviously out of sync and lack confidence in my ability.
And although I’m realizing that my difficulty settings are low, I still distrust life — unfairly perhaps. But it’s not like I grew up in the most user-friendly environment. But anyway, I’m still left wondering how to correctly interface with this world so as to craft the life I want to experience. Hm, I’ll have to think about this some more.